One Last Thing to Do Before I Die edition by Steven Drew Goldberg Literature Fiction eBooks
Download As PDF : One Last Thing to Do Before I Die edition by Steven Drew Goldberg Literature Fiction eBooks 
ONE LAST THING TO DO BEFORE I DIE by Steven Drew Goldberg is a thought-provoking and comedic novel that explains why Max Wiseman, a rich and successful lawyer in Manhattan, would want to kill himself. It also answers why before committing suicide he decides to travel across the country to find Derrick Frankenmeyer, the person he hated most in his life. The story is told in the first person through Max's disillusioned eyes, his razor sharp wit, his keen social observation, and his hysterical intolerance for ignorance and immorality. It will make you laugh out loud and think about what is truly important in life.
One Last Thing to Do Before I Die edition by Steven Drew Goldberg Literature Fiction eBooks
There is only one main character in this book, he is named Silver.Silver is a washed up rock star, aging, lonesome, warm and pitiful.
He is divorced. and estranged from his only child. He lives in an apartment
and has 2 good friends cut from the same pattern, They sit around the pool.
drink beer and stare at the young girls in their bikinis. When he learns that
he has a life threatening condition he decides not to have the operation he needs.
He knows he is a failure and a goof up. This is not my kind of book----sex and bad
language. However, Silver is such a great character that I kept on reading, and I kept
on enjoying every chapter. The writing is excellent, the story is good--lots of laughs
and it holds your interest. There is so much sex and bad language that I hesitate
to recommend it to my senior friends, but I will because it is good.
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One Last Thing to Do Before I Die edition by Steven Drew Goldberg Literature Fiction eBooks Reviews
Driven by anger, maybe deep-seated, Max Wiseman (does his last name signify a sagacious wit) embarks on an odyssey to rid the world of his archenemy. He has not seen his enemy since he was eleven years old, but Derrick Frankenmeyer represents all that is wrong with American culture and those who do not live by the Golden Rule.
We meet Max who presently is a Prosecutor for the District Attorney's office. He is practicing law in its purest sense, and he can do this because he amassed $12 million working for law firms who charge high fees. He invested his money, has no wife and children to support, and he is healthy. So what's the problem? Well, Max is angry, he is angry with people who are inconsiderate, who use "it's our policy" for answers and he believes that for every good thing that has or will happen to him, he will incur more suffering than it's worth. So he begins his journey to find Derrick, the bully from camp, who beat him and embarrassed him. Max is out for ultimate revenge.
Max's excursion from New York to Albuquerque and back again is full of Americana, mostly at its worse. The customer service employees who represent the airlines, hotels and rental car companies are particularly gruesome and unrelenting in their incompetence and lack of courtesy. Max, however, is hell-bent on resolving his search for Derrick and committing a final act. He does meet Americans, with little money to sustain themselves, who surprise Max with their positive philosophy on life.
During his crossing, Max also puts himself into dangerous situations. He isn't brave and he isn't smart in dire circumstances, but he never really takes any revenge on those brutes who have purposely endangered him. So what do I make of Max? He made me laugh, he adored his father and he really can procrastinate. Fortunately, what sets Max apart from many Americans is money. Yes, I agree that many in our culture are dumb, cruel and downright useless, but Max had a way out that few of us have. He had money; he didn't think it was important but whenever he wanted to directly help someone, a waitress, a farmer, a hotel van driver, he could make their lives a little bit better by giving them an outrageous sum of money. He was able to reward many and live a very good life. So "do unto others ..." finally worked for Max. But in Max's real world, he had the Gold, so he could set many of the rules.
Without giving away the end of the novel, let's say Max finally can unload his anger. Read this book, it's a different angle on our society and who's running the show.
Max Wiseman is a successful thirty-eight-year-old Assistant United States Attorney in New York City... he was raised by his Father to always practice the "GOLDEN RULE"... and he has made up his mind to kill himself! Oh yea... there is also one major thing he has pledged to do before he kills himself... and that is... (Though he practices the "GOLDEN RULE") ... to kill Derrick Frankenmeyer first. Frankenmeyer is the person he hates more than anyone he has ever known in his entire life. The reader will learn later on that Derrick absolutely tortured Max at summer camp when Max was "ten years and eleven and a half months" old... and the bullying continued relentlessly including on Max's eleventh birthday and beyond during that seemingly endless summer. This abusive and menacing behavior included punches in the arms and legs... being forced to eat a worm... rocks and sticks in his bed... finding his pillow hidden everywhere under the sun... and more. This caused long term... unrelenting damage to Max. (Besides the obvious dedication to the aforementioned murder to be completed before he killed himself.)
As the old saying goes "IT'S THE JOURNEY... NOT THE DESTINATION"... and that's the utterly intriguing and enjoyable trip the reader gets to go on with Max... as he heads out on his odyssey to kill Derrick and then himself. This book succeeds and entertains on many different levels... and that in itself makes this such a unique book among the myriads of books on the market place. If you're an experienced heavy duty business traveler like I am... you will literally fall in love with the author and applaud his every word *AND THOUGHT* as he absolutely rips apart and ridicules the airline industry... as they justly deserve. His scorching arrows hit nothing but bulls-eye's dripping with sarcasm as he describes employees... especially "Fanny" at GFY Airlines. (NOTE 1 The "G" stands for "GO"... THE "Y" stands for "YOURSELF"... and the "F" stands for... I can't tell you... or from personal experience wouldn't publish my review... but I have faith that you can figure it out!) If you've ever been greeted by an unfeeling airline employee who refuses to look you in the eye when they ask how they can help you... and after they refuse to help you... with their number one excuse being "that's our policy"... and you ask why... and it's "because" it's their policy... and then they ask if there's anything "else" they can help you with... and you say... "HOW CAN YOU HELP ME WITH *ANYTHING* ELSE... WHEN YOU HAVEN'T HELPED ME WITH ANYTHING YET?" There are times the author says these things directly to the employees and other times it's his razor sharp parenthetical-humor-inner-voice speaking. If for no other reason than the author describing his inner-voice's snappy repertoire... this book was a blessing to me. I at least now know that I am not the only one with this inner-voice that becomes unhinged with the ludicrous way a paying customer is treated by the airlines. The same goes for hotels... the post office... and other members of the so called "service" industry. The author deftly handles everyone that comes his way in this mesmerizing trip to final redemption.
Intermixed with the tasty well deserved barbs... are bits of humanity that catch you off guard and are so beautiful and touching that tears were brought to my eyes. An interchange with a "shuttlevanbus" driver Earl makes Max consider thoughts besides the murder/suicide... but never stops him from his life plan. If the potential reader connects with the author and his inner-voice like I did... you will almost become one with the human being that merges between the character... author... and inner voice. Max gets "illusioned"... disillusioned... beat up... urinated on... laid over... delayed... misinformed... and for the first time in his life... eats chicken fried steak... goes in a Wal-Mart... goes in a pickup truck... and yet has time for moments of clarity such as
"I STARED OUT OF THE WINDOW WITH MY CHIN RESTING ON MY HAND AND WATCHED THE HASHED LINES ON THE HIGHWAY SPEED BY, EACH ONE APPEARING AND THEN DISAPPEARING IN AN INSTANT. FOR SOME REASON THIS MADE ME THINK ABOUT HOW FLEETING LIFE IS AND HOW, WHEN COMPARED TO THE AMOUNT OF TIME THE EARTH HAS EXISTED, EACH ONE OF OUR LIVES IS NO MORE THAN A BLIP IN HISTORY, LASTING EVEN SHORTER THAN ONE HASHED LINE ON THE HIGHWAY FLASHING BEFORE MY EYES. EVEN SO, THAT BLIP IS FILLED WITH SO MUCH PAIN AND HEARTACHE AND DISMAY AND FRUSTRATION AND HELPLESSNESS THAT I WONDERED WHY MORE PEOPLE HADN'T ARRIVED AT THE SAME CONCLUSION THAT I HAD--THAT THE BLIP WASN'T WORTH SEEING THROUGH TO THE END."
I do an awful lot of reading and I can't remember the last time I read a book that so seamlessly combined outrageous humor... heartfelt pathos... brilliant fiction and non-fiction... and provided companionship to "my" inner-voice... so it realized it wasn't alone.
NOTE 2 FULL DISCLOSURE- Though I don't know the author and have never met him. He contacted me after reading some of my reviews on and thought that I would enjoy this book and sent me a copy to review it. If you check my personal profile... integrity is what I try to build my life around... so when I say this is a great book I mean it with all my heart.
There is only one main character in this book, he is named Silver.
Silver is a washed up rock star, aging, lonesome, warm and pitiful.
He is divorced. and estranged from his only child. He lives in an apartment
and has 2 good friends cut from the same pattern, They sit around the pool.
drink beer and stare at the young girls in their bikinis. When he learns that
he has a life threatening condition he decides not to have the operation he needs.
He knows he is a failure and a goof up. This is not my kind of book----sex and bad
language. However, Silver is such a great character that I kept on reading, and I kept
on enjoying every chapter. The writing is excellent, the story is good--lots of laughs
and it holds your interest. There is so much sex and bad language that I hesitate
to recommend it to my senior friends, but I will because it is good.
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